Attack on Wicked
by 1nsanerobot
Summary: This was supposed to be a funny crossover for my friends and I to chuckle about. Then it got away from me. Basically the plot of the Wicked musical in the setting of Attack on Titan


**Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I owned Attack on Titan we'd know what was in the freaking basement, and if I owned Wicked then Glinda, Elphie, and Fiyero would be in a healthy polyamorous relationship**

**Author's Note: Please don't judge me too harshly this is one of the first fanfictions I've seriously written that hasn't dissolved into smut (those ones will never see the light of day so don't ask) so just like... Go easy on me. Please.**

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The population was in an uproar. Church bells rang, people leaned out of windows and ran across busy streets to tell others the news.

"_Good news_!" They shouted, "_she's dead! The Titan Shifter is dead! The wickedest woman there ever was, the enemy of all within the walls, is dead! Good news_!"

In the center of Wall Sina, near the palace, a man pointed to a rooftop, shouting excitedly, "Look! It's Glinda!"

A woman had alighted on the rooftop, the wires flying back into her 3DMG with a whizzing sound. Her curly blonde hair was pulled into two identical ponytails on either side of her head to keep it out of her harness, and the unicorn decorating her lapel and shoulders indicated she was a member of the Military Police.

"It's good to see me, isn't it?" She giggled, grinning when everyone cheered and shouted in assent. "No need to respond, that was rhetorical," she said, waving her arms to quiet the crowd. Taking a deep breath, she launched into a speech.

"Fellow citizens," she began, "_Let us be glad. Let us be grateful! Let us rejoicify that goodness could subdue, the wicked workings of, you know who_!"

"_Isn't it nice to know_," she continued, "_That good will conquer evil? The truth we all believe'll by and by, outlive a lie, for you and_," but she was interrupted.

"Glinda!" The crowd parted to reveal a man staring up the woman on the roof. "Exactly how dead is she?" He asked, his hands on his hips. The crowd murmured uncomfortably. How could they be sure that the woman who's death they celebrated was actually dead? She was Titan Shifter, after all.

"Well, there has been much rumour and speculation," Glinda said, pacing back and forth, "innuendo, outuendo," her face hardened into a determined expression, "but let me set the record straight!" She stood on the roof with her hands clasped behind her back and feet shoulder width apart, looking very impressive indeed in her uniform.

"According to the King's personal clock, the evaporation occurred at the thirteenth hour, the direct result of a female Cadet. Yes, the rogue Titan Shifter is dead!" Glinda smiled somewhat sadly as the crowd cheered again.

"_No one mourns the wicked_!" One person shouted.

"_No one cries, they won't return_!" Another continued.

"_No one lays a lily on their grave_!" A group cried out.

"_The good man scorns the wicked_!" A man yelled.

"_Through their lives, our children learn_," a group of women added.

"_What we miss, when we misbehave_," the crowd seemed to shout in unison.

_"And goodness knows, the wickeds' lives are lonely_," Glinda called out over the cacophony, "_Goodness knows, the wicked die alone. It just shows, when you're wicked, you're left only... On your own_," she trailed off, looking somewhat crestfallen.

The crowd took no notice of Glinda's expression, continuing to shriek and shout, "_Yes, goodness knows, the wickeds' lives are lonely! Goodness knows, the wicked cry alone! Nothing grows for the wicked, they reap only what they sow_."

"Glinda, why does wickedness happen?" One woman called up to Glinda.

"Hm. That's a good question. One that many find... Confusifying!" Glinda looked pensive for a moment before speaking again.

"Are people born wicked? Or do they have wickedness thrust upon them?" She mused. "After all, she had a childhood. She had a father, who just happened to be the governor of an outlying district," she said, looking off into the distance as if reminiscing.

Some years ago...

"I'm off to the assembly, dear," a man in an impressive suit called out, standing in the entryway to his house. A woman hurried over to him, giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"_How I hate to go, and leave you lonely_," the man said to his wife, stroking her cheek.

"_That's alright, it's only just one night_," his wife smiled and grasped his hand.

"_But know that you're here in my heart, while I'm out of your sight_!" The man kissed his wife briefly before turning and walking out the door.

The present...

"And like all families, they had their secrets," Glinda said, the crowd staring at her with rapt attention.

Some years ago...

"_Have another drink, my dark eyed beauty, I've only got one night left here in town_," a man crooned as he and a woman twirled around a room, the woman drinking from a strange flask.

"_Have another drink of sweet elixir, and we'll have ourselves a little mixer_," the man continued. The woman had nearly drained the flask and the man stared at her expectantly, saying, "_have another little swallow little lady, and follow me down_."

The flask empty, the woman brought it away from her lips and gasped, giggling and catching her breath. She suddenly slumped over, and the man gently carried her to the couch. He produced a syringe full of a strange green liquid from his coat and injected it into the woman's shoulder, leaving her asleep on the couch as he left, a strange bronze key slipping out between the buttons of his shirt...

The present...

"And from the moment she was born, she was, well, different," Glinda sighed. She sat on the edge of the roof, her feet dangling over the edge.

Some years ago...

A pained scream reverberated through the house.

"It's coming!" A woman yelled.

"Now?" A man asked, rushing to his wife's side as a midwife guided her through childbirth.

"The baby's coming!" The midwife beckoned the man to the end of the bed.

"And how!" The man said as the baby began to crown.

"I see a nose!" The midwife leaned closer.

"I see a curl," the man waited with baited breath.

"It's a healthy, perfect, lovely little... Ahhhhh!" The midwife and the man both screamed as the baby's torso came into view.

"What is is? What's wrong?" The woman asked, sitting up to try and see what the screams were about. The midwife pushed her down again.

"How can it be?" The midwife breathed.

"What does it mean?" The man asked her.

"It's atrocious!" The midwife spat.

"It's obscene!" The man shouted. His wife looked terrified.

"_Like a froggy, ferny cabbage, the baby is unnaturally_," the man and midwife paused. Should they tell the woman? Perhaps it was just a trick of the light. Taking a deep breath, they said in unison, "_Green_!"

The midwife held up the baby, a perfect little girl with a bit of shiny black hair already. Perfect, that is, except for the definite mint tinge to her skin.

"Take it away," the man growled. When nobody responded, he said it again, more commanding this time, "Take it. Away."

The present...

"So you see, it couldn't have been easy!" Glinda said, her voice catching at the end of the sentence.

The crowd took the story of the birth as extra reason to celebrate, however. Such an unnatural being, even from birth! It was lucky she was dead!

"_No one mourns the wicked_!" They shouted, "_Now at last, she's dead and gone! Now at last, there's joy within the walls_!"

"_And goodness knows, we know what goodness is_," they continued, "_Goodness knows, the wicked die alone_!"

"_She died alone_!" Glinda strained to make herself heard over the crowd and glean some sympathy for the one who's death they celebrated.

"_Woe to those, who spurn what goodnesses they are shown_," the crowd quieted down when Glinda shot one of the wires from her 3DMG and swung over their heads to a different roof.

"Well, this has been fun!" She said. "But I have business to attend to, what with Doctor Jaeger's unexpected departure and all. So, if there are no further questions," she made to shoot her wire again, but stopped short when someone in the crowd called out to her.

"Glinda!" They yelled, "Isn't it true... You were her friend?"

The crowd gasped. Surely their beloved Glinda, pride of the Military Police, hadn't been friends with the wicked Titan Shifter!

"Well, it... It all depends on what you mean by friend, I suppose," Glinda stammered, wringing her hands nervously. "I did know her, that is, our paths did cross... When we were Cadets," she said, adding hastily, "But you must understand, it was a very long time ago, and we were both very young!"


End file.
